Today is my son's birthday. He's at school having his presents and treats. No idea what he finally settled on - but it will be fun and cool etc... We sent a large box of goodies including a fart machine, a t-shirt with "Robot disguised as a human" on it and the usual computer game. I found a brilliant poster too. He is mad about soft drinks and this is a poster of nothing but cans of drink. I probably should have got him a poster of John Barrowman in retrospect.
Now feel well rested and restored after a smashing residential creative writing experience. All of us (apart from the tutors) are living with mental health issues - so it was a powerful mix of vulnerability, insightfulness and courageous writing. Over supper a few of us decided we couuld replace the Psychic Channel on the TV with Psychotics Channel and we went to town seeing who could cap whom with their experiences of psychosis. There are only so many dinner parties you can go to where that is a topic which animates the whole table.
Yesterday I would equate with a day which feels as important as my wedding day. It was the day I finally heard my vocation as a writer validated and I accepted it as my future. I had spent the course lapping up the creative writing exercises, and the affirmation, particularly from the tutors, both of whom are established authors. During the tutorials I was encouraged to see myself as a professional author - and to not hide behind my self doubt and anonymity. They were excited by the small sample of work I had submitted and I came away feeling my mind had been blown.
Even in my wildest daydreams I had only anticipated an 'above average' response to my submissions - and the comment that the first pages of the novel were going OK. I was ready for the catch all that "Obviously it would need lots more work..." Instead I came away under their careful tutilage understanding that I have a talent which is formed and that I must jolly well get on with my writing. Hang self doubt. I am fired up - just like the first flushes of love. I decided to leave the course last night in order to come home and get going. Going I have got.
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